• Parody of “Wellerman” by Nathan Evans

    A Star Trek Star Shanty

    Listen to the original song here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qP-7GNoDJ5c

    /

    There once was a ship that put to the skies

    The name of the ship was the Enterprise

    The warp went up, her bow dipped down

    Oh beam me up, Scotty, beam (huh)

    /

    [CHORUS]

    Soon may the Enterprise come

    To seek out new civilizations

    Explore strange worlds and boldly go

    Where no man has gone before

    /

    She’d not been two weeks from Earth

    When out of warp, the Reliant burst

    The captain called all hands and cursed

    He’d take that Khan in tow (huh)

    /

    [CHORUS]

    Soon may the Enterprise come

    To seek out new civilizations

    Explore strange worlds and boldly go

    Where no man has gone before

    /

    Before the torpedo left its launcher

    The Reliant’s phasers fired and punched her

    All hands Red Alert, torpedoed, lunged her

    When she dived down low (huh)

    /

    [CHORUS]

    Soon may the Enterprise come

    To seek out new civilizations

    Explore strange worlds and boldly go

    Where no man has gone before

    /

    No phasers stopped, Khan was not freed

    The captain’s mind was not of greed

    And he belonged to the Starfleet creed

    She took that ship in tow (huh)

    /

    [CHORUS]

    Soon may the Enterprise come

    To seek out new civilizations

    Explore strange worlds and boldly go

    Where no man has gone before

    /

    For forty minutes, even more

    The phasers fired then stopped once more

    Torpedoes were lost, there were only four

    But still that Khan did go (huh)

    /

    [CHORUS]

    Soon may the Enterprise come

    To seek out new civilizations

    Explore strange worlds and boldly go

    Where no man has gone before

    /

    As far as I’ve heard, the fight’s still on

    The phasers fire, and Khan’s not gone

    The audience makes their regular call

    To encourage the captain, crew and all (huh)

    /

    [CHORUS x 2]

    Soon may the Enterprise come

    To seek out new civilizations

    Explore strange worlds and boldly go

    Where no man has gone before

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  • Parody of “The Battle of New Orleans” by Johnny Horton

    Based on the film “The Empire Strikes Back”

    Listen to the original song here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aXfuQqkwa5I&pp=0gcJCfwAo7VqN5tD

    /

    In 3 ABY, we were hiding out all nice

    Along with General Rieekan on a giant ball of ice.

    We shot down a probe droid that fell down from space

    And we fought the Empire’s walkers at the Hoth Echo Base.

    /

    [CHORUS]

    We fired our hooks and the walkers kept a-coming.

    We were losing lots of speeders but we weren’t about to yield.

    They fired right back, and then we went a-running,

    On off the planet Hoth into an asteroid field.

    /

    We looked at the horizon and we see’d the walkers there;

    They must have had a hundred of ‘em big metal bears.

    They stomped so loud they made our hangars ring;

    We manned our snowspeeders and we didn’t say a thing.

    /

    [CHORUS]

    We fired our hooks and the walkers kept a-coming.

    We were losing lots of speeders but we weren’t about to yield.

    They fired right back, and then we went a-running,

    On off the planet Hoth into an asteroid field.

    /

    Old Rieekan said we could take ‘em by surprise

    If we didn’t fire our hooks till we looked them in the eyes.

    We tripped lots of walkers, but still, we were out of luck.

    They wouldn’t stop coming, and by golly, we were…well…

    /

    [CHORUS]

    We fired our hooks and the walkers kept a-coming.

    We were losing lots of speeders but we weren’t about to yield.

    They fired right back, and then we went a-running,

    On off the planet Hoth into an asteroid field.

    /

    Yeah, we flew from the base and we flew from the planet,

    And we flew into space when we finally had to yield.

    We flew so fast the Star Destroyers couldn’t catch us,

    On off the planet Hoth into an asteroid field.

    /

    We flew through the field until our hyperdrive burned out,

    So we hid inside a cave to see what that was all about.

    But when we started our repairs, our luck went sinking down.

    This wasn’t any cave: it was a space slug we had found!

    /

    [CHORUS]

    We fired our hooks and the walkers kept a-coming.

    We were losing lots of speeders but we weren’t about to yield.

    They fired right back, and then we went a-running,

    On off the planet Hoth into an asteroid field.

    /

    Yeah, we flew from the base and we flew from the planet,

    And we flew into space when we finally had to yield.

    We flew so fast the Star Destroyers couldn’t catch us,

    On off the planet Hoth into an asteroid field.

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  • In addition to drawing my usual sci-fi comic strip for this website, I’ve also started writing sci-fi parodies of popular and less-than-popular songs. This first one is a parody of “Sink the Bismarck” by Johnny Horton, based on the 1977 original “Star Wars” film. Enjoy!

    Listen to the original song here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xLCkkrq417k&pp=0gcJCfwAo7VqN5tD

    /

    In May of 0 BBY, the war had just begun.

    The Empire had the biggest ship that had the biggest gun.

    The Death Star was a battle station, big as a small moon,

    With a super-laser that could blow up planets real soon.

    /

    Across the cold and inky void was the planet Alderaan.

    And all the Rebel pilots, they knew it, every man,

    They had to blow the Death Star, the Empire’s battle moon,

    Stop the super-laser that could blow up planets real soon.

    /

    [CHORUS]

    We’ll find the Empire’s station that’s been making such a fuss.

    We gotta blow the Death Star ‘cause the worlds depend on us.

    Yeah, lock your S-foils to attack, and spin those droids around,

    When we find the Death Star, we’re gonna cut it down.

    /

    The Death Star came to Alderaan, and on that fatal day,

    The laser started firing, five million miles away.

    “We have no weapons! Don’t attack!” Was Princess Leia’s plea,

    But when the smoke had cleared away, the planet ceased to be.

    /

    For six long hours and weary minutes, the Rebels waited by.

    Dodonna told the pilots, “Prepare to fight and fly,

    ‘Cause soon it’s going to come to us, to fight us it’ll start.

    We gotta blow the Death Star into little tiny parts.”

    /

    [CHORUS]

    We’ll find the Empire’s station that’s been making such a fuss.

    We gotta blow the Death Star ‘cause the worlds depend on us.

    Yeah, lock your S-foils to attack, and spin those droids around,

    When we find the Death Star, we’re gonna cut it down.

    /

    The Death Star came the seventh hour, and it saw the system’s sun.

    Ten minutes out from Yavin 4, the Rebels made their run.

    The leader of Red Squadron, he said, “turn your ships around—

    We’ve found the mighty Death Star, and we’re gonna cut it down.”

    /

    The Rebels’ guns were aimed, the torpedoes came in fast.

    The last one hit the reactor, they knew it couldn’t last.

    That mighty battle station now is just a memory;

    “Blow the Death Star” was the battle cry that shook the Galaxy.

    /

    [CHORUS x 2]

    We’ve found the Empire’s station that was making such a fuss.

    We had to blow the Death Star ‘cause the worlds depend on us.

    We locked our S-foils to attack, we spun those droids around,

    We found the mighty Death Star, and then we cut it down.

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